Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
I don't think brook has ever known best
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Randomize
