worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
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