Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
Randomize
