they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
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