so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
Randomize
