are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
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