3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
i think i have two assholes
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Randomize
