this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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