and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
