Theres a note on my antibiotics that says "Do not chew or crush. Swallow whole." I think that would be a good tattoo for just above my penis.
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
