I think i ate a live goldfish last night. that i caught with my hand in a kiddie pool. my stomach really hurts.
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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