dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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