Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
