It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize
