Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
Randomize
