Taylor Swift is so right about you.
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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