i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize
