I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Randomize
