I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Randomize
