I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
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