Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
I came so hard my ears popped.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize