YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Randomize
