we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
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