I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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