1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Randomize
