You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
