"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
