Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Randomize