I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
my being single is dangerous.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
Randomize
