idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Randomize
