do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
Randomize
