I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
I will die if light touches me.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize