"it" just moved
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
Acid is not a monday night drug
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
