a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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