this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
Randomize
