If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
Randomize