That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
worst night to have a conscience
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
Randomize
