She's JV to your varsity
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
So I just went to clothing optional bar
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
