He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
Omg I joined a choir last night...
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