She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
Randomize