I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
Randomize
