Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
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