dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
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