The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
I always "accidentally" drop a condom and make sure she sees it's a magnum. By the time I'm inside her and she realizes how small I am, it's all over in a flash and I'm done. Plus, they never call back so I never have to see the girl ever again. #gratefulforprematuretinypenis
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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