He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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