That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
