i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
The woman at walgreens tried to sell me clearance condoms with my fake eyelashes. Does it look like I get laid?
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize
