Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Randomize
