Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Please, let me fuck your mom
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
