so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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