So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
